An Open Letter to Young Seekers
Merry Meet!
If you are under 18, you will probably already have noticed that
young folks generally elicit different reactions from adults in
the Pagan community than what you'd like. You've probably had
a great deal of difficulty finding someone to answer your questions
honestly, or a respected teacher who is willing or able to teach
you what you really want to know.
Following is part of the general information we make available
for young seekers. If you have any questions, we will do our best
to answer what we can, but please understand if sometimes the
answer is "you really need to ask your parents." (If
your parents support your interest and would like more information
about Wicca, please have them contact us.
We hope you can understand that without knowing your parents,
and hearing directly from them that they support your interest
in Wicca, an ethical teacher or mentor cannot work with you. Most
groups and private teachers don't accept seekers under 16 or 18.
(Some even require you to be 21 -- or even older!)
There are many reasons for age restrictions. The biggest is that
until you are over 18 or are emancipated (a term which means that
legally you are fully responsible for yourself) your parents or
guardians have the legal right to guide your religious instruction,
and to decide what is best for you. Anyone who interferes with
a parent's rights in this area can get into a lot of legal trouble,
and in most states can even get arrested.
But there's also a second big reason why many teachers and mentors
won't accept young students, even with their parent's permission
-- a lot of Wiccan training is very demanding and can be very
difficult, even for older folks. A lot of folks who begin formal
study drop out rather quickly. And the younger people are when
they start, the more likely they are to drop out.
Remember that adolescence is the time of a person's life when
questioning everything from politics to fashion, from science
to religion, from philosophies to health practices is quite healthy
and normal. That is what much of growing up is all about -- finding
out what you really believe deep down inside. You already know
what your parents think. You have figured out what society expects.
So the real work is figuring out what *you* really need, want,
expect, and think.
And while you're in this state of flux, figuring out just who
you are, you are instinctively working through exactly what you
believe about how the world works as well. The personal beliefs
about deity that you develop are part of the very core that shapes
who you will become. Almost everyone instinctively knows this.
(That's why religion and philosophy are argued about so much.)
But it can be very hard to fully explore and develop your spiritual
self while you're working on getting accustomed to all the changes
in your physical body, and all the social, educational and many
other changes that are a part of adolescence.
Maybe you've got it all figured out. That's not impossible (no
matter who tells you it is). However, for the most part, you are
in what most adults would consider an experimental time. Even
if you are convinced Wicca is for you, most adults will still
be wary of your choice. They'll be worried that you are looking
into Pagan paths because you want to shock your parents. Or hex
that nasty so-and-so who's causing you so much trouble. Or get
that hottie in second period to fall head over heels in love with
you. And it's really not good to get Wicca into for those reasons.
First of all, you would be undermining the religion. Wicca is
a spiritual path that is followed by thousands of people who frequently
have to struggle to be accepted in a society that often does not
value what we hold dear. Not many will look kindly on someone
causing trouble and drawing a kind of attention most of us work
hard to avoid. (And if you do one day truly want to walk the Wiccan
path, you will have difficulty being taken seriously, or finding
a reputable teacher or group to work with, if you have a track
record of using what you learn in selfish ways.)
Second, you would be undermining yourself. Hexing, charming,
shocking... all of that has a price. Maybe just a little damage
in the long run, but maybe more than you can deal with. Shocking
people is a great head trip. It's an easy way to get energy. However,
it's also addicting. Once you start, you can fall into the "just
a little further" routine and wind up with some bad karma,
people hating you, a jail sentence, or worse. Hexing and charming
is manipulative. And what if it turns out you don't really like
the person you charmed after all? What if you hex someone and
they get so depressed they suicide? Then their life is on your
head. You will have to deal with the consequences of your actions
for the rest of your life.
A lot of young people (and some older folks) get into Wicca for
these kinds of reasons, because it's 'cool', because they like
other folks being just a little scared of them, or because they
are looking for a way to feel different or special. And a lot
of groups and teachers have had to clean up trouble caused by
folks who had these sorts of less-than-honorable reasons for wanting
to learn about Wicca and Witchcraft.
So it's pretty easy to see why most adults don't want to get involved
with a young seeker. They're worried that they could get into
a whole lot of legal trouble, or have to fix problems they didn't
cause for what they see as a teenage joy ride.
That said, if you are really serious about your interest in Wicca,
there are some things you can do to help prepare you for formal
Craft training:
- Prepare for a career that suits your values and your talents.
The research, organizational skills, and concentration that
you develop doing this will prepare you for your studies and
work in the Craft.
- Read. Read. Read more. Study mythology, religions, societies,
artwork, music, anthropology, psychology, mathematics, science,
and anything that relates to early cultures. Pick your favorite
God or Goddess and learn as much as you can about them, what
they rule over, the culture they come from and the history of
the people and societies who honor them. Most respected Wiccan
traditions value scholarship, and will require a lot of old-fashioned
bookwork and study. If you already have good study skills, know
how to do good research, and have a broad foundation of knowledge
you will be several steps ahead of the game.
- Practice your artistic capabilities with enthusiasm and dedicate
your work to your God/ess or to Spirit. Do you love to write?
Paint? Sing? Write music? Draw? Sculpt? Everybody creates. Dedicate
your expressions to your spiritual path. Rejoice in your creations.
It will bring you closer to Deity in unexpected ways.
- This is a nature religion, so learn as much about nature as
you can. Study astronomy. Take up gardening. Go camping. Read
about herbalism. The more you learn about Mother Earth, the
better prepared you'll be for your formal training.
- BE EXTRAORDINARILY CAREFUL ABOUT THE COMPANY YOU KEEP. Some
people are predators on the unwary and innocent seeker (*especially*
young seekers who are having trouble finding the resources they
want!). As an individual struggling to find your own path, you
might find a person or a group that is subversive, thrilling,
and powerful. But keep in mind that brainwashing, beatings,
rapes, murder, drug smuggling, and other crimes have been charged
against many alternative groups, and in several cases have been
proven to be quite true. At the very least you could be accused
of things you didn't do simply because you hang around a known
trouble-maker... or you could become addicted to any number
of (legal or illegal) drugs, or wind up with a nasty case of
herpes or worse. Predatory people aren't in the business of
having your best interests in mind and they aren't known for
being entirely careful, no matter what they say or do.
So how do you tell the simply colorful individuals from the
predatory? This is a list of questions to ask yourself to help
you better determine if potential friends, religious groups,
or whatever are for you or not. Rate them 0 to 10, then add
them all up for a total score. The higher the total score the
more predatory they are. If there's a cause for you to rate
a question with a (*) with a 1 or more, stay away from that
person or group at all costs.
- Do they tell others what to do?
- Do they claim to know everything and hate it when you
try to correct them?
- Do they have a lot of others quoting them or do others
(usually 'friends' of the person in question) tell you that
the person is totally cool and always right?
- Does the thought of contradicting them frighten you? (*)
- Do they recruit people for their gang or groups?
- Do they insist that any money of yours is theirs? (*)
- Do they insist that you share a lot of your stuff with
them?
- Do they tell you not to say anything about their activities?
- Do they ever threaten you with blackmail, bodily harm,
or force? (*)
- Do they tell you that you can't leave their influence
or group once you 'join in'? (*)
- Do they have powerful enemies (real or imagined)? (*)
- Do they have a bad sense of humor?
- Do they tend to make up your mind for you?
Waiting is pretty hard for all of us. But it really is worth
it. Here are a few book recommendations that you can work through
while you are waiting...
21st Century Wicca: A Young Witch's Guide to Living the Magical
Life by Jennifer Hunter; Written by a woman in her early twenties
who became Wiccan as a teenager. Gives a good introduction to
many Wiccan concepts without talking down to you, oversimplifying,
making grandiose claims or relying on shoddy research.
When, Why... If by Robin Wood; The best introduction to Wiccan
ethics in print. In an easy, informal style Robin covers both
the basis for Craft ethics, and also how they apply to everyday
life and how they shape the Wiccan worldview. (This is required
reading for all our students.) It's hard to find sometimes, but
Robin Wood has a web site (www.robinwood.com) that it can be ordered
from if you can't find it locally.
Positive Magic by Marion Weinstein; This is a good primer about
how the proper use of magic can change your life. Using a simple
and direct style, Marion covers many aspects of the proper foundations
and ethics of magic, and many of the ways it can fit into a complete
spiritual practice.
A lot of good concepts are explored in fiction. A new series
of young adult books called "the Powers of Three" isn't
bad. Many things - especially the magical bits - are written much
more sensationally than what happens in real life to make the
story more exciting, but a lot of the general ideas are accurate.
Here are some other fiction books we recommend to our students:
Strands of Starlight; Strands of Sunlight; and Spires of Spirit
by Gael Baudino; This is the first and fourth books in a series,
and a collection of related novellas. It's a beautiful storyline
dealing with Witchcraft, Elves and the Inquisition, and linking
the Middle Ages to our own times and issues. (The second and third
books are not as good, are not required to make sense of the story,
and have some themes that your parents may not be comfortable
with you reading. Ask your parent's guidance if you think you
might want to read them.)
Gossamer Axe by Gael Baudino; Although the premise is fanciful
- ancient Druid learns to play heavy metal in order to rescue
a long-lost love - the exploration of themes in family ties, music,
magic, power and pagan belief is woven into a masterful tale that
is one of the best we've read.
Bell, Book and Murder by Rosemary Edghill; This is a collected
reprint of the three Bast mysteries (Speak Daggers to Her, Book
of Moons, and Bowl of Night), where the leading character is a
real Wiccan, instead of a Hollywood witch. The mysteries are a
bit simple for those who love deep, twisted plots, but the realism
of day-to-day life as a witch, and the wry commentary on the Pagan
community is more than worth the read.
We generally recommend that any serious student avoid books by
Raven Grimassi, Gerina Dunwich, Sirona Knight, Kisma Stepanich,
Silver Ravenwolf, Edain McCoy, AJ Drew, DJ Conway and Patricia
Telesco. Many of these have an easy-to-read style and some have
even won awards, but much of their history is based on incomplete
research or inaccurate references, and a lot of what is in their
books has little in common with the majority of what is taught
in most Wiccan Traditions.
If you have read - or own - some of these books, it's nothing
to worry about. But you probably should compare them against more
recommended sources, as well as against what you learn from researching
cultures, history and mythology. (Think of it like a game and
use them to improve your research skills - can you find the historical
errors and the inconsistencies in these author's works?)
The best places to look for good books to give you a foundation
for future Craft studies is not the New Age or Witchcraft sections
of the bookstore or library. It's in the History and Mythology
sections, in Archeology, in Psychology and in Personal Development.
Look for books that give you solid information, that help you
learn how to tell verifiable facts from opinion or personal experience,
and that help you learn how to use your mind and think logically.
These are skills that will help you in all areas of your life
- and they will put you way ahead of the game when you're ready
to start your formal training in the Craft.
Brightest Blessings on your journey!
By Sana Karine (Zanetta Wilson), based on material by Saira,
HPs, Crystal Moon Coven; from Home Circle materials. This piece
may be freely copied as long as it is used in its entirety and
credit is clearly stated. For more information, please email homecircle@mindsprin.com.
